...that no one is safe anymore, no, their items belong to the great Lupin the XIII'th. Just a few days ago I crawled out of the ruins, nicked a fat lady's purse, and was down an alleyway when I'd seen someone who'd seen me first. "Oy. Ye be a rapscallion after me own 'eart. Come under my wing and learn to be a master at your chosen craft." The old man in the shadows said to me. On that day, I, Darko-Valith, became an apprentice burglar. Me and my mentor, who called himself 'monkey punch', pulled many great jobs together. It was our special sign to send a card to the place of our heist, with our names and Person Identification Numbers, fingerprints, and retinal scans. Our card had the exact date and time the crime would take place, usually a week after the card was received, then we'd show up and swipe the most valuable of jewels and items from right under the watchful camera of the Consortium. People were dazzled, puzzled, and ouytraged at how we could always take what we said we would, when we said, and only that. We only really burgled to ruffle their feathers, show how powerless people were to the unknown. My master called himself Lupin the XII'th, and was known for reading a lot of Manga. He recently passed away due to old age and a criminal conspiracy in the hierarchy of the corporations that own both the clone labs and the Consortium. Maybe just the latter, you know old age is really a myth anymore. I have accepted the title of Lupin the XIII'th as a way to commemorate his memory. I am no longer an apprentice, I am a burglar in the right. Oh yeah. Perhaps one day I'll be a master thief. Until then, buy the Consortiums newest locks, those are easy,oh, and do feel safe, I'm after items, not lives. I'm actually a gentleman thief, after all. With love, Darko 'Lupin XIII' Valith.
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